Hi,

First up today, The blog is few months old it feels a bit crazy but also awesome how the years have flown by and how the blog has become something bigger than i could ever have imagined back in 2010. I want to celebrate this starting on Monday by offering the biggest discount i have ever given on my courses and guides. But it will only last for couple of days.

Today i would also like to share few simple steps that helped me to overcome social nervousness and to totally change my own life. Let me know what you think in the comments section and if you find it helpful then I'd be very happy if you share it with friends or maybe on Facebook ,Twitter, StumbleUpon etc.

I always get nervous before a date/meeting/social gathering and that holds me back form being my true and best self and form doing and getting what i want what can i do to overcome this?

Many people think that they can handle the situations because they have been through many of the experiences of the life. This is an issue that used to hold me back too in the past and I have more experince with it than i would have ever wanted. Back when i was still single. I often got quite nervous before a date and before that when I didn't have a date at all in a long time. I got nervous before most social situations

It was no fun

Things weren't hopeless though And today I would like to share few small habits and steps that simply put, totally changed my life.

Slow Down

A few minutes before you step into the meeting,job interview or date that makes you nervous slow down.

Walk slower to the meeting place move slower.. Then stop

Breath

Stand still or sit down for a minute. And then just breath.  Take a little deeper breaths than usual. Make sure you breathe with your belly and not with your chest ( a common problem when people get nervous).  Focus on just your slow in-breaths and out-breaths for a minute or two. This will calm your mind and body down think too much is not gonna help you make it easier to think normally again and that singular focus will draw you back into this moment again instead of leaving you lost in the thoughts of past failures or future worries that can be so destructive.

Assume Rapport

Assuming rapport means that just before you met someone you pretend and think to yourself that you are meeting one of your best friends.  Doing this will allow you to naturally slip into a much more relaxed,comfortable,confident and enjoyable emotional state and frame of mind.  In this frame of mind the conversation and smiles tends to flow naturally without much thinking.  Just like with your best friends.

It is, in my experience, a very simple habit to adopt but at the same time it is also and incredibly powerful habit for tapping into your best social self. By using these things over and over they will become habits that are easy to use. And over time as you get good results in social situation the old normal of feeling nervous will replaced by a new normal.  A normal where you are at least most of the time relaxed and confident  in social situation because all your recent experiences put together have changed how you view yourself and what you expect on dates in meetings and other such situations.

Thanks

Lokesh Kumar.